Written Memoirs

2010-04-28T03:58:00.001-07:00

Losing a friend.

2010-02-21T06:11:00.000-08:00

I haven't blogged for a while. Still I do not care if no one reads this post. I just want to write, read, and repeat the process all over again.

I want this blog to be short.

So to begin with,

I lost a friend.

I like this girl and my friend likes this girl also. We have promised that we would still stay friends no matter what happens. But then, there came a time when my friend and I won't talk to each other. Cold and damp presence I must say. I talked to him.

Neth: "Bakit hindi ka na namamansin?"
"Ako ba yung hindi namamansin?"
"Oo ikaw kaya."
"Inaantay ko lang na iapproach mo ko."
"Pano kita iaapproach eh ikaw nga yung umiiwas sa community?"
"Hindi ako yung umiiwas. Yan ang hirap sayo nag aassume ka eh."
"Panong hindi ako magaassume? Eh katulad dati inapproach kita pero sabi mo inaantok ka lang pero yun pala at the end of the day sabi mo may problema pala."
"So binabalik mo yung dati? Sinumbat mo na lahat sakin ayoko na."

And there. Consequently, smaller fights pushed on. Like about the community. And because of that I was forced to resign from my place as a leader.

And yesterday, February 20 2010.

We talked--sumbatan at sigawan. Wala din pinatunguhan. Sinabi lang nya na "Hindi na maibabalik yung pagkakaibigan natin at yung closeness". And I agreed with it.

I knew that this day would come. My friend had sugar-coated me with words before like "Wag mo isipin na may gusto ko sa kanya ah, mas mahalaga sakin yung pagkakaibigan natin" and "Magkaibigan tayo hindi mawawala yun.". FUCK. Really fuck.

My feelings?
Until now, I can't accept it. We were close friends and loosing this guy is indeed a big lost for me. Until now, I am still bugged by it. I'm sad about what happened. And in fact, parang wala lang sa kaniya. Go on pa din siya sa buhay niya at ineenjoy mga kaibigan pa niya.

My conclusion?
I may have lost a great comrade but I will surely gain someone new. Someone better. A true friend that will accept me at my worst so that he/she will deserve me at my best. Don't fret; I won't forget that I once had a good friend like him but nonetheless, I think I am happy right now. I still have other friends. Real friends. True friends. Friends that won't leave me behind. Friends that are ready to help and support me in my troubles. And what's important to me right now is HER. As long as I still have her at my side, there are still reasons for living. :)

In fact I am now glad for what have happened. I am glad that I learned something. :)

P.S.
And I am forced to quit Cabal Online because of this. Too bad I already spent around 2k for the game and now I'm quitting on it.

Realizations.

2009-11-06T06:24:00.000-08:00

Yes, another bunch of realizations for the past week.

Indeed.
I am sensitive.
I act so immature and childish.
I easily get mad at things with superficial reasons.
That is why there really is a need for me to change myself.
But I learned that the hard way.

So we are playing Cabal.
And to make the long story short, my friend there "left" me in leveling up although we have been leveling up together for a lot of time. I got a little offended there. He said he waited for me for hours so I can level up. But in my perspective, I cannot call it waiting. It is leaving. He leveled up with another person, so where is the "wait" there? So my childish tantrums sprouted and I got mad. The other person, likewise did get angry too.

Anyway, so much for my rant. I was hesitant at first to admit that I was wrong. But nevertheless, with such superficial reason, for only an online game, I've realized how immature I am for getting offended for such.

And for the worse part.

For the first time in my life, I got confused and troubled with my current friends.
Well here are just few of the painful words I received from my friends that time:

1. "Pagod na ko makisama sa'yo eh."

RANT: Well this one did hurt me a lot. It was first time in my life that I have been told of this statement. Sa dinamidami ng mga naging kaibigan ko, lahat sila, natanggap ako sa kung sino ako. Nakaya nila makisama sa akin. My thoughts? If you can't accept me for who I am, then so be it.

REALIZATION: The fact that someone told me such statement means there must be something wrong. I must have reached somebody's limit. I must have reached somebody's patience. Indeed . So much for my childish acts. So much for immature acts. So much for sensitive acts.

2. "Ilang beses na akong nagpapasensiya sa mga ugali mo."

RANT: Same rant. If you can't accept me for who I am, then so be it !

REALIZATION: This statement just made me realize that there really is a need for me to change myself. AMPFF. D;

WELL THEN.

First. I would like say SORRY to my friend. He really is a good guy: a kind and benevolent one. But I reached his limits. He did consume so much patience for standing up with my acts. He had to be angry. I know a simple sorry wouldn't be enough, but I am indeed sincere. SORRY.

And next. You guys want a change right ? Well then, I'm giving you what you want.

YOU'LL SEE WHAT I MEAN.
We'll see about that.

Storm = Stranded = Sucks.

2009-09-29T06:50:00.000-07:00

So here are the series of unfortunate events that happened to me after damn ONDOY literally stormed my life.

SATURDAY. It was raining real hard. There were no suspension yet announced so I insisted on going to school. I rode the LRT, wearing my PE uniform, bringing with me casual clothes so I can change after the class. My usual stuff. So I arrived at school, and there were only a few of us there. Me, Karla, Mavs, Wilmay, Allen, Cherrie, Jeriel, Christelle, Liu Wen and Raval. I played badminton for a while, then our professor called us for attendance.

I thought I was lucky, that I did not miss the attendance at that time. But nevertheless, I was wrong.

The rain did not stop. Our school was flooded at around the ankle level. Wilmay, Christelle, Mavs, Allen and Cherrie went along first to find a place to eat, while I stayed for the time with Karla while she was waiting for Ong. Miko called me and asked how are we doing. Wilmay then texted me and asked me to go to Mcdo so I can eat with them. So I left Karla and pursued the flooded tract to Mcdo. Good thing I brought my slippers along so rushing into the ankle-leveled-flood was not a problem. Wilmay, Christelle and I ate at McDonalds, while Allen, Cherrie and Mavs ate at KFC. The rain is still pouring heavily, with the streets still flooded. Then we agreed to go to the nearest computer rental to let time past, hoping that after a few hours, the rain will stop and the flood will subside.

But we were wrong again.

The rain just grew stronger. Next thing I know, water is already coming inside the computer rental. We panicked. We don't know what to do by that time. We went outside and saw the flood, already at knee level. I texted my father and said "Pa, pauwi na ko. Mejo nastranded lang kami sandali.". Then my father called me. He said "Wag muna kayo umuwi. Mahihirapan ka lang. Hanggang dibdib na ang baha dito sa Pureza. Pati bahay natin binabaha na. Magstay muna kayo sa mataas na lugar."

And we stayed.

Wilmay, Christelle and I went to KFC to plan for a while. Should we venture into the high-level flood? Or should we find a place to stay for the meantime? The rain is getting stronger and heavier back then. People began to text me "Kenneth, san na kayo? Okay ka lang ba" and such. A train of thoughts ran onto my mind. What will happen to us? What will happen to my family? To my friends? Are they all okay?

Nevertheless, we chose to find a place to stay. Luckily, Wilmay's older brother rents a condo unit at P. Campa. But to go requires us to pass through waist-level flood. DAMN, right ? So after a series of price-negotiating with pedicab drivers, we agreed at a P40 per person ride. Wilmay and Christelle rode at the top of the pedicab with me at the side. And damn, the flood reached up to my hip level throughout the journey :/ And finally we reached the place !

Wilmay's brother lent me some clothes to wear. And we decided to sleep for the night since the rain won't stop. I slept at Wilmay's brother's room while the girls stayed at Wilmay's brother's girlfriend. We went home the next day, after the rain has subsided for a little.

When I reached home, our whole first floor was a mess. And damn, our PC modem and DVD was freakin' broken because of the knee-level flood on our first floor of the house. But thank God, everyone of us were safe!

///

Some of my friends were greatly affected by the storm. Preii, Talyne and Boms. Their houses were engulfed by the flood :[

//

I was touched by how friends are concerned for each other. People flooded my texts such as "Okay lang kayo?" "Kenneth kamusta na kayo?" "Neth, musta house and family mo" and more. XD Natouch lang ako sa kanila.

/

Nevertheless, I will continue to pray for people who were greatly affected by the storm. If only I can help them in some way, I would really love to. :[

Rant

2009-09-18T09:03:00.000-07:00

I was blabbering on a previous blog posts how my friends responded to my actions, but then again, I actually made a stupid mistake.

Last night, I was waiting for my friend to call my cellphone because my friend scheduled a call conference for us at 9PM. Living in an area where there would be no signal inside your home, I went outside the house at around 8:30PM, sat at a bench, enduring the cold breeze, waiting for the damn call. 9:30PM and still haven't received any of them calls.

I texted people. I said "You guys must've started the conference without calling me again." Then my friend replied "Hindi na magcoconfe, matutulog na kasi ako."

So I was enraged.

I waited for almost an hour for that damn conference and yet, in an instant, they would just say that. I really was mad at that time. That friend of mine did that thing not only once nor twice. I remember one time where I waited for him to finish the war in an online game, which lasted for exactly an hour. He said that he would rejoin me in levelling again after an hour, so I impatiently waited. And yet after that damn war, he instantly logged out, without saying a thing.

I texted him. I said "Sana man lang nagsabi ka para hindi ako nag-antay. Baguhin mo yang ugali mong ganyan, nakakaano na kasi." Friend replied "Grabe ka naman, tingin mo sakin walang ginagawa?" I replied "I know your busy doing an assignment, but it wouldn't even take a minute to text na hindi na tuloy ang confe." Then he replied again, saying sorry.

A train of thoughts ran on my head.

I just did one stupid thing. One heck of a thing.

Saying "baguhin mo yang ugali mong yan" was harsh and too much.

I did not think before I texted.

An act of immaturity indeed.

So the next day, I saw him on his desk, feeling sick. Nakonsensiya ata ako, lol. I approached and I apologized. He said that it was okay, that he realized he did something wrong also, and that it should be forgotten. And yeah, he was not feeling well that night.

Nevertheless, I know for a fact that he is, by any chance, still keeping a minute amount of anger on me.

For the point of this stupid blog entry:

I blogged about this because I learned from this mistake of mine. Let me quote another friend of mine. She said that "The TRUTH hurts, but only TRUE FRIENDS tell the truth." I loved what she said. I just realized that I want to live in a word where truth prevails, even though it hurts a lot, than to live in a world of lies and deceit. I do value every person around me.

In relation to my previous blog post:

So instead, instead of being mad at them, I should just simply accept what my friends are telling me. They were, true friends, indeed. The only thing that they should have done was to say it in a nicer way, not in a straightforward, harsh one.

That was what I should have done to. Saying "baguhin mo yang ugali mo" was an "ouch". I just realized that if someone was to say that to me, I would get hurt as well. I should've instead, put a smiley on it so it wouldn't give an implication of being furious.

"Haha, baguhin mo kaya yung ugali mong ganyan :D".

-fin.

Blame

2009-09-12T06:53:00.001-07:00

I just made lots of realizations the past few days. I just don't know how and why but things are getting more obscure and puzzling, I must say.

Okay so there is this issue about this girl, which is a classmate of mine. [Story about her will be saved as a draft]

So what happen is, I don't want to hurt her feelings. Her heart is still immature and very inexperienced. What I did was I sought help from my friends. So far, I've only told four trustworthy people about this issue, because it's really bugging and giving me headaches much. I told them because I expected them to help and give me friendly advices on the issue.

But.

What I get was stupid comments. They all said the same things: "Ang sama mo!" , "Naaasar ako sayo!" , "Bakit ganyan ka?" , "Pinagassume mo lang siya!", "Maling mali yang ginawa mo!" .

WTF?

Can't I even get a "Naiintindihan kita." , "Aww, dapat kasi ganito.." or such?

Do I really deserve such painful comments? Did I really did that evil to experience those painful words?

Okay, so alam ko na may mali akong ginawa. Pero dapat pa bang ipamuka sa akin kung gano ako kagago? Kailangan pa ba nilang ipamuka sa akin na masama ang ugali ko dahil sa ginawa ko? Kung ganon, nagkakamali kayo. Wala kayo sa kalagayan ko. Hindi niyo alam ang pinagdadaanan ko. Akala ko niyo ba ganun ako kagago at kasama na wala din akong nararamdaman? Siyempre meron! Nasaktan din ako sa nangyari samen. Hindi ako manhid. Tao din ako.

What's worse-one of this four persons blamed me again a while ago. "Nakakaasar ka talaga. Nakakaasar talaga yung ginawa mo." But since I treat her as a good friend of mine, I just let it be. I pretended to be ok. I just pretended that those words did not pierced through me.

Conclusion?

Thank you much FRIENDS. >:(

Changes.

2009-08-25T08:04:00.000-07:00

LOL. These past few weeks, and days, I've noticed several life changes.

First. I am playing Cabal Online again. After promising myself that I won't involve myself into online gaming anymore as it greatly affects my studies. The reason for playing Cabal again? Read on.

Second. Friends. During these past few days, I started to join my classmates frequently. Dan, Miko, Allen and Ernest. Well, Miko was the one who invited us (Me, Allen and Ernest) to play the game again. I agreed to make a new character but I was hesitant at that point. What valuable something will I gain when I play? Will these affect my studies and bring them to their lowest limits again? But nevertheless, I gave in. We started playing Cabal. I accepted the fact that here I am, back from the lands of Nevareth, enjoying the game together with my classmates. Too bad, Dan can't play for now because internet connection at their place would be impossible.

Anyway. I haven't get the chance to join my previous friends again (first semester, second semester friends). I don't know if they got their own circle of friends as of now as well. I missed them lol. I don't know but I feel like a little weird and different when I'm with my current friends. Dan and Miko are bestfriends, as well as Allen and Ernest. So epal lang ako. Daite or even Liu Wen, I perceive? Nyahaha. Also I do feel like sort of being out of place with them on certain things, LOL. I also get this feeling that they are thinking that the world would be better without me. LOL. So much for that haha.

And last issue. The main idea of this stupid blog entry: Trust. I had this big crush on a classmate and I only told a few people. These people are the one that I put my full trust on--Dan, Miko, Allen, Ernest, Karla, Cherrie and Frances. Iza and Rhea knew it as well. It would just be natural to tell them to my friends right? But I intentionally told it to Cherrie and Frances because they were close friends with her. Karla, I told her because I feel confident when I'm telling stories and issues about her. BUT. UNFORTUNATELY, one of them broke out. Mavs, a classmate of mine knew of it. How? She heard of it from a person from another section. Damn. So the chain of infection probably started with one of the people I told of telling it to a person from another section, and that person from another section consequently telling it to Mavs. ONE OF THOSE 10 PERSONS is the criminal.

Thanks to that person, I just learned a very valuable lesson. TRUST should not be given instantly. TRUST is indeed, very important and it is undeniably a factor that what keeps friendships or any other relationships holding on.

To the person who spurted it out, I shall give you one advice. Don't ever dare try to explain the reasons for your imbecile action to me. Don't ever dare try to make the hell out of me.

I might just kill you.

TORN.

2009-08-25T08:00:00.000-07:00

Aargh. How come she did these things to us. We did our best and gave our most valuable time and efforts for them but that is how they repay us.

I just realized how insolent and unprofessional she was.
Well, thank you for making me realizing how incompetent you are.
May God bless you on your endeavors.

--Thanks to an ate from Altairs that help us reflect on those realizations.

Community Nursing - Energy+Money

2009-07-22T07:32:00.000-07:00

The fanfold of events that happened to us a while ago where really.. urgh... annoying, I must say?

The white duty shoes were released to us a while ago, so I have no choice but to bring it with me during the community. Together with Wilmay and Candice, we rode the LRT to Santolan Station, and then together with Dan and the others, we rode a van to go to the staff house.

The staff house was nothing less compared to a storage house. No equipments, no furnitures, only a single sink and a single fan. And it was as hot as hell. Everyone was having diaphoresis back then. The rooms there were also small for us 5 section ! Grr.

Then after meeting in the staff house, Maam Janelle accompanied us to Barangay Inarawan. We were dead tired of walking for almost an hour! We were so tired that we asked Maam Janelle if we could buy a fresh, cold bottle of water on our site. We asked the store if they had water, and yes, they surely do, but only fresh bottled mineral water. Yeah. NOT COLD. We were all dead thirsty there so we need something COLD to quench our thirst! So we bought softdrinks instead, and Maam Janelle scolded us. Maam Janelle scolded us for the second time when few of my classmates are eating while walking. Haha. So much of the scolding part.

I was the one who initiated the section (LOL). I said that we should divide our section into 4 groups, each group assigned to draw the spot map on a certain area, taking into the detail the size and number of the households, while establishing rapport with the people there. We did it for 40 minutes, and went back to the staff house riding a JEEP. Yeah, we should've rode the JEEP instead of walking from the staff house to the site. RAWR.

Anyways. So much of that. I'm effin tired and I want to sleep and end this blog as soon as possible.

Anyways, let me compute what I spent for the day:

7 - jeep to UERM
14 - LRT to Santolan
25 - Van to Staff House
12 - Softdrinks
7 - jeep from site to staff house
15 - snacks
17 - jeep from staff house to LRT Santolan
14 - Another LRT ride
13 - Pedicab ride from LRT to house

P124 pesos !!! And 78% (P97) of that were spent entirely for TRANSPORTATION !!!! haha,

So much of that. I'm sleepy. Goodnight.

SEMINARETREAT

2009-07-19T04:23:00.000-07:00

Okay. So last July 18th was the start of this retreat. I arrived at school around 5am, wearing my blue jacket and brining with me a blue bag and my violin. We rode the bus, and departed UERM around 6:30 I suppose? And after a ride of around 45 minutes, we arrived at St. Michaels Retreat House ! Well, the place was not that big, but the facilities and environment there were outstanding.

Anyways. We went to the conference hall, left our bags there and the retreat facilitators explained the house rules and such. A count-off was also conducted to monitor the numer of retreants. Then BREAKFAST came !! Haha. LOL. Sausages and scrambled eggs were served.

Well I sat with 6 girls that time, (Lyza, Karen, Badette, Jeanne, Aubrey, Girl number 1) so I ate a lot. I finished their food for them LOL. Then a seminar about Demography was conducted by a priest. He told us that the idea of the Philippines being overpopulated was just a myth, and hell yeah, I am convinced now that it is. Haha. Then snacks were given (Juice and Kuchinta). Then another seminar, now about Human Sexuality was conducted. I like both the speaker and the topic. Human sexuality is indeed, not limited to sexual act. After that seminar, it was... LUNCH time !! I ate adobo and sinigang! :D

We went back to the conference hall adn the room assignments were given. And damn, they draw lots so you won't know who your roommates are.

I was assigned to the Staff Room. It was a room for 25, and got a large shower/wash room that can accomodate all of us. Well, the good thing is Dan, Allen, Ernest, Miko, Wen and Daite were my roommates. And other section B students as well. And other people who I know by name (Johann, Chino), but I talked to them for a few words or so. And former classmates too (Ong, Russel). Then we went back to the conference hall and a discussion about New Age was conducted. Well, I slept at here, hahaha. But New Age is what we call a Christless belief, such as Zodiac Signs and etc. Haha. Anyways, as I've said, I've slept there so. Haha.

Then the dreaded Reproductive Health Bill session was discussed. Frightening. There were 200+ slides, and the seminar lasted for around 3 and a half hours, oh damn. The seminar discussed about conception, abortion and etc. I was attentively listening to the topic at first, but I was so effin' bored thereafter. All of us are bored as hell too. @__@

And alas. After the long discussion, dinner came. This time, I sat with Lyza, Frau, Karen, Richard and Girl number 2. The food served was Burger Steak and Menudo ba yon?

Then the Confession time came. This would be my confession like around after 4 years? So I confessed to the same priest who discussed demogrpahy a while ago. And then I went back to our room. I showered for a few minutes, then Dan and I decided to do some violin playing, because we guess that our roommates would be noisy before they would sleep. Haha. And yet they are. Haha. It was really good playing with Dan. He was a virtuoso haha. We did Canon in D and an Ave Maria duet. The Canon in D was quite ok, if you tend to exclude my few fingering and intonation mistakes. The Ave Maria was ok and blending at the first parts only, but it gets worse on the latter parts. Dan taught me violin stuffs too. He was indeed an expert on the instrument. XD

Then Me, Dan, Allen, Jeriel, Russel, Mark and Chino talked about ghost stories inside the room. Russel told about the ghost at their school camp. Jeriel told about the ghost who passed through him (tumagos daw sa kanya). Then Mark told a series of stories about a child ghost that lurks in their school.

We then slept at around 11:30. Wahaha I decided to upload a sleeping-plan to let you know how so congested we are at the room. :|

Woke up at around 4am, took a morning shower, took a usual morning routine and went out at around 5:30am for a morning walk. We went to the girls dormitory and we were scolded by Maam Uayan haha.

A morning mass started the day. Then breakfast was served. This time it was ham and eggs. :] Hehe. Then a lecture on Marriage was given by the same priest who lectured about Demography. I was sleepy that time, that I did one crazy thing: doing a countdown until his lecture was finished. It was based on the number of slides from his PowerPoint. Hehe. Here:

Well it involved of checking a box everytime the lecturer switches slides. Hehe.. Then snack was served and lecture about Pornography and Violence was conducted thereafter. I listened to it because I was quite interested. LOL haha. Then LUNCH time !! We ate Lumpiang Shanghai and another food na hindi ko alam ang pangalan.

After that a seminar about Sex Education:Attack to the Innocence was lectured to us. Quite interesting but I slept again at the first few parts, and listened thereafter.

Nevertheless, to make the long story short, we can call it a Series-of-Seminar-with-Overnight-with-LotsofFood, instead of a retreat. Haha. Indeed, we were loaded with lots of seminars there and barely had free time to chitchat with friends. But it was undeniably a fun experience. :]

Here are some cute pics too :

SURRENDER YOUR CELLPHONES !! XD

Scary Tree indeed XD

SECTION B: SMILE :D

Injection!

2009-07-08T06:26:00.000-07:00

Well for the past two weeks, our batch was again, as usual, busy for the return demonstrations in RLE. I am done with suctioning and enema over the past week, and a while ago, I just finished returning a demonstration on administering an injection!!

Last week, I practiced the skill on my classmates. My first try was an Intramuscular one, on Jeremiah. I knew I had tremors, and it worsens everytime I feel nervous. Who wouldn't be? The sight of a needle pricking through your skin... just the thought of it makes me nervous! Nevertheless, I have to do it anyway. So I did the injection on Jer using a 3cc G23 needle, and yeah, I did great. Cheers for my first IM. And then I tried my first Intradermal on Lyza. And hell no. We can call it a total FAILURE. XD I guess my angle at that time was high that it penetrated deeper into the sub-cutaneous level.

But I shouldn't give up. I practiced hard on Tommmyyy. Tommmyyy is a tomato taken from our refrigerator. I practiced on him very much so that I could perform the said skill properly. And then again, I tried another intradermal injections on people, including Lyza (for the gazillionth time) and John. And I finally got it !! The skin near the injection site bulged, and there was none, or minimum presensce of blood. My tremor shakings minimized a lot too. And I did a pretty good job on doing intramusculars too! They said that I was pretty good on administering injection. LOL, hehe. After such practices, I finally said to myself that I am going to pass this return demonstration!

A while ago, I had my retdem. Well, this is what freakin' happened. Maam Cariaga was inspecting me on my intradermal injection. I followed the steps. Cotton...put cotton on fingers....position syringe bevel up.... And then I inserted the needle. Maam Cariaga said "Wow, magaling to maganda pagkakapasok!" Yeah. I knew it was good hahaha. Then when I was about to inject the solution. PSSHSHOOWOOWT!!!! The solution bursted/leaked out of the injection! I mean, in the middle of the injection of the NSS, the damn liquid leaked out on this part:

Call me defensive, but I know the injection was faulty at that time. I inspected the syringe and I know there was something wrong there. Maam Cariaga told me that it's ok, and since I did the injection right. A dot of blood with a bulge on Belen's forearm. And then I administered intramuscular, and I did it perfectly. I got a score of 1.00 on the return demonstration. Thank you, Maam Cariaga. XD

It just worked out well after practicing many times, after committing homicide on Tommmyyy the tomato, after murdering Lyza's forearm, after spending so much money on buying needles and syringe, after memorizing the assessment procedures on the evaluation tool, I'm glad that the result was acceptable. Thank you, God. :)

Online Gaming Venture

2009-07-05T06:05:00.000-07:00

People know me in different identities, and one identity I do possess is being an Online Gamer.

I started to enter the abyss of online gaming when I was in sixth grade. A classmate of mine had this K-Zone Kids Magazine, and a freebie CD comes with it. I looked at the CD, and it showed RAGNAROK ONLINE. The drawing on the CD cover was indeed fabulous, that it made me borrow it from my classmate, and immediately installed it at home. The next thing I knew, I was venturing in the world of Midgard, in the world of Ragnarok Online. The game requires you two things: you have to be online to play it, and you have to avail of their prepaid load to play [P50 for 8 hours of playing, P100 for one week and p350 for one month]

My first character was a stupid Swordsman, a hybrid one [having both Vitality, Agility, and Strength]. I got tired of it after a few weeks and decided to make a new character. Then there was this x2 EXP on the Chaos server, so I immediately made a Magician on that server, thinking it was the start of something new. Nevertheless, it was another stupid one [having Agility, Intelligence and little Strength]. So I let go of that account and gave it to my classmate. And then I made an Acolyte--a job that is equipped with the task of healing, buffing and supporting your party. I enjoyed doing that job--I love the feeling that people ask me to heal and buff them. And oh, she became a Priestess in no time. Yeah, that acolyte was a girl. I made it a girl, pretended to be a girl in the online world [no I'm not gay] but the purpose was to scam items from other players. And it damn worked. Stupid people would believe that I'm really a girl, then I would borrow their expensive items and I would never bring it back to them. Incompetent fools. Haha. My Priestess reached a very high level that time, I was even recruited into a prime and well-known guild in the Chaos server, and I would boast of it to my Grade 6 classmates. I was the strongest and richest dude among them. And some friends I met in Ragnarok Online knew me for my healing and supporting skills.

Then I entered highschool life. My classmates also played Ragnarok, and one of them was surprised how rich I am, and asked if I could give him a certain item. The thing is, I have that item and I wouldn't bother giving it to him. One day, he asked if we could play together so I could give him the item. But I never intended to play for that day, and instead he asked for my Username and Password so he could transfer the item. I so damn-stupidly trusted him. And the next thing I knew when I opened my account, my character had no items and money on.

I was angry at my classmate at first, but I realized that that was Karma's work. I scammed during the peak of my Ragnarok life, and never looked and understood the feelings of the people I've scammed. I just thought that this was a game to lie and deceive people online. I thought that I thought I was clever and cunning. I thought that the cycle would repeat over and over again: trick people-scam-level up-scam-level up-scam-scam. I forgot the reason why I chose to be a Priest--that was because I wanted to support people. So after being so stupid, I left the game and decided to quit.

I played another online games. I played Gunbound, a side-scrolling-turn-based game where you operate a some sort of a vehicle that fires a shot to hit the enemy. I played on it in a small amount of time. Then I played Khan Online, another MMMORPG game. I choose to be a "Micko" class; the healer and buffer class in the game. The game was quite addictive, that it was my first time to play for 8 consecutive hours on the rental. But I quit again after they have announced that they are going to be P2p [pay to play]. Then I found another online game. O2 Jam was a music game were you get the feeling of playing the song by pressing certain keys in the keyboard, while dressing your avatar with some nice clothes, accessories and instruments. I got hooked on it only for a while.

My baldy avatar with his handy guitar

Then on my second year, a friend of mine taught me how to play Flyff (Fly for Fun) a full 3d game that lets you fly !! I loved the idea of flying so I tried it out and get addicted to it. I created then the Assist class, to become a Ringmaster--their healer-buffer-support class [as usual]. I really enjoyed that game. Fortunately, I found some screenshots left of neth09, my character.

My character, riding a broom (left) and a board (right)

Flyff became a part of my life. I joined a guild there and we were really bonded. I even liked this girl I met in the guild. I also remember that I made forum siggies on Flyff, and I also even made fanfics about the game !!! The fanfic I made was admired and praised by readers, motivating me to write more chapters of it. Unfortunately, due to personal reasons, I wasn't able to. I left the forum thread of my fic hanging, and if I would get the opportunity to visit it, I would find posts like "Nasan na yung writer? Update na po sa story please!" And such. That made me want to continue my writing but I just can't. I really really really really enjoyed playing Flyff. But after a while I have to again, quit the game because of educational and financial purposes. The cost of the fun it gives was that it took a large sum of my money and that it consumes my supposed to be studying time.

My chracter weilding a rod for healing and buffing spells (left), and weilding a shield and knuckle to punch those enemies of (right)

After that, I played Audition Online -- a game that involves pressing the arrow keys to make your character dance. Sounds lame isn't it? I thought too at first. But after playing for a while, I got addicted to it. My high school classmates were playing it too, and we often find time together to play. There were the times that we would all find a rental outside school just to play together. Or we would schedule a time on vacation times so we can meet together online and play. It really is addicting to play it. What makes it addicting were the different modes. My classmates and I loved the Girls Vs Boys mode, where me and my boy pals would form a team and battle the girls. There is also the Couple Dance, where you choose your partner to dance with! Another fun was the 172bpm dance craze, where my classmates would often miss on the steps, leaving me the only one left dancing on the floor (lol. peace out :D). I do believe that I got better on the game instantly. A guildmate of mine thought that it my character was my second account because of my skill. Haha. I was one of the best Audition players in my batch then. But, my classmates improved a lot ! Eloisa, Maro and Aanne really did great on the game. Eloisa's level got higher than mine, but I our skills are on par. Maro has the same level as me, and our skills are also the same. Aanne's level was behind me, though she was great. I was happy for them that time. I was happy that I experienced putting on a good match with them. :-)

One memorable experience there was being official couple with Eloisa. Yeah, she was my ex-girlfriend (LOL), so we often do couple dances, and we really do rock on the Ballroom Mode that time. We often win and acquire the most number of hearts (to gain a heart, both partners must gain a perfect on the same step) among our enemies. But the couple did not last long, since I already quitted playing Audition. :-)

My character (the one in black in front) and Eloisa's character (at the side of my character) playing Ballroom Mode, acquiring already 12 hearts, even our partners still doesn't acquire one. XD

I then went to first year College and played Cabal as a Blader [the speedy character]. That hack-and-slash game has really awesome graphics and had an addictive gameplay, but I quitted because their servers were stupid. There were times that you couldn't enter in-game because the servers were so damn full! >:( Next, I played MyRO a private server for Ragnarok on the sembreak. I lasted it for a month or so, because I got lazy that none of my classmates or close friends played it too. The server was also boring because there were insufficient events for the players to enjoy. Frankly, what only made me liked the server was that it was very balanced and that it give you the feel of playing the official pRO. I sold my hardworked-gained-itmes there for Globe Load (Yep, it was a famous system of trade that time). While other items of mine were given during my hosted events there. Then I played DarkRO, a private server for Ragnarok during second semester on first year College. My classmates played the game too so I joined with them. I have really a lot of fun playing with them--staying all night to help each other levelup, joining events hosted by my rich classmates, PK'ing and killing one another, and doing quests together. That was really fun. My playing time would take up to ten hours and more. I thought the fun would last forever, so I thought of buying 4000 DarkRO Creds for 400 PHP. I was able to buy myself a Valkyrie Armor back then, but I got so freakingly disappointed because after a week, the game scheduled a rollback, and damn. I lost all my items and credits that I bought for 400 PHP.

An image taken during the in-game wedding of Gregg and Mheg. The audiences present in the event was me, Oliver, Justin, Dianne, Fenina, Grace and Cath. All of them are my classmates that time :-)

And as of now, I quitted playing DarkRO. And as of now, the person who sold us the 4000 creds still did not give us back our credits. So what will happen next, I do not know. Whether I will continue to play again in the online world, I do not know. What I know, for sure, is that, I really had fun playing these games. That's all folks. The end of another lengthy post of mine. :D

Music in Me - Choir Singer

2009-06-23T06:46:00.001-07:00

I have this feeling that I should write about this a long time ago, but nevertheless, I am writing about it now.

I WAS a member of the Nursing Ensemble, the nursing choir of the UERM. I took the auditions last June 2008, sang my favorite choir piece Bituing Walang Ningning, and after a series of not-so-fortunate-events, I passed! I was put in the Bass voice back then. At first, I wanted to be in the Tenor voice, since my highschool classmates complement me for the quality and pitch of my voice. Some say I could make it for Tenor 2. But two things hindered my way. First is puberty. My voice got deeper and broader, consequently affecting my pitch and quality. Next is the Philippine Madrigals. I liked them a lot, and I really do idolize their basses!

So next thing I know, I just loved being a Bass Singer. Puberty really did its part. I was complemented by people because of my singing. Some would say "Ang galing nga nya eh, nakaya nya mag-isa yung kanta, ang lakas pa". Or some would say "Ang galing, bagay ka talaga mag Bass ang laki ng boses mo." I admit myselfy that I am not that great in singing when it comes to solo. I can now only sing those not-so-high songs, but one thing is for sure. I do great when doing duets. And as for daily communications, people would also say that I have a very deep voice. I just smiled at those candy complements, although deep inside, I really appreciated them. Well, I think those compliments are just the fruit of my perseverance. I practiced a lot during my Nursing Ensemble days. I borrowed and stole pieces, listened to recordings a lot and attended practices.

The Nursing Ensemble, indeed, taught me a lot of lessons. I remember the time our conductor made me cry. Yeah, I did cry. The ensemble surely taught me virtues of discipline, hardwork and perseverance. Not only that. Because of the ensemble, I gained new friends! I had good ties with Lyza, my classmate-choirmate, we sang a lot of times together, and 'twas surely fun. I also became friends with Alan and John, my classmates that are really good singers (they would've been Tenors if they joined). I also befriended Jorina, a Soprano, Pat, another Soprano, both of which are classmates with Jason, a Tenor, which is my classmate from Elementary and High School, and Mags, an Alto, a classmate from elementary. I also made friends with higher years! There are these times we would go KHubbing with Kuya Ty and Ate Samiah. Or hanging out with Kuya Mico, Ate Isa, Kuya Kevin, Ate Loujaine and Ate Angel. And of course, I met Ate Tasha ! :D Nevertheless, it was really a fun experience. :))

But nothing lasts forever. After our first semester, we barely had time to practice with the choir. Practice times often interlaced with my study times. The second semester was really busy for us. I really wanted to attend practices, but studies and lack of time management hindered my way. So things just ended up worst. The choir officers are still sending us group messages on practice and event updates, even though we haven't attend practices for a very long time. The choir conductor even changed, and new members were added. Lots of pieces in store. But what is left for me is to just accept the reality that I have to prioritize things. First things first. And I chose.

Now, I am on my second year college. My grades were not bad, I was a DL for first semester, but for second semester, hindi na. My average was f*ckingly 1.77 (yeah, hindi pala 1.76) which was so damn 0.02 away from being a DL. Anyways, my second semester that time was mixed with playing of DarkRO so I guess that's what happened. Anyways, my experience with the choir group was something to be treasurable. It expanded my musical abilities, knowledge, skill and passion. It was even the first time I stole a musical sheet. XD

The question is, "Is this the end?" ? What happens next, only God knows. But if ever I could practice again with the ensemble, I would really love to. I just have to find the right time and opportunity. And as for my musical path, it doesn't end here, since I am learning to play the violin. The violin would be my next vessel into the musical world. So I guess, I'm blogging about it too next time.

Sorry for the lengthy post. Godbless :-)

Ongaku wa daisuki desu ! :-)

Snapping Strings

2009-06-22T07:21:00.002-07:00

STRING is for SNAP !!

Today, for the gazillionth time (LOL that’s way too exaggerated), the E string of my violin again snapped. It was irritatingly out of tune, so as I tried to move the peg to tune it, *SNAP*. It broke! I guess I moved the peg so tightly, that it made the tension on the string too high, that it made the string break. Good thing, I have another E string in store, for purposes of situations like this. Well, the E string that I currently have is an ordinary steel-core string, from which, it sound is brighter (matinis). And a good ear will absolutely notice the difference of the sound of my G, D and A strings (which are nylon-core strings that produce a warmer sound than the steel ones) from my E string. The thing is, I have to find a new one and buy a new nylon/perlon E string.

Although this is a tragic event for me, and for other violinists as well, I think after breaking lots of strings, I’ve learned my lesson. Lesson in life. That is with your friends !! First, the string is in tune, then after a while, it goes out of tune, and if you push the pegs too much, the tension on the string increases, thus making the string break. Consequently, you and your friends are going together really fine, then after a while, an unexpected conflict arises, you try to straighten it out, and if you push yourself too much, proving that you were right all the time, giving no room for communication, giving no room for the other side to explain, giving yourself all the glory, proving that you were right, then the string might snap and you will loose that person.

Well, so much for ka’dramahan today. Goodnight J

Welcome to Blogspot!

2009-06-22T06:50:00.000-07:00

LOL. That's meant for me. I'm just welcoming myself in blogspot/blogger.com, because I decided that it would be nice to blog, and express my feelings through writing. LOL. I want to share my thoughts here, especially to me friends, but I really don't care if they read my writings or not. What matters most, as of now, for me, is to have an online journal and portfolio of my thoughts and feelings. Because I think that it would be also nice, that someday, as I take another step in my journey of life, as I grow older, and if I ever become nostalgic, I have something to reminisce, and recall.

And that would be this online blog. Godbless :-)

P.S.
And oh. Im NEVER planning to make this online portfolio a Survey Blog. LOL. I mean those blogs that are often posted in Multiply, and as bulletins on Friendster. Those types of blog that says "Tag 5 people and answer these questions bla bla" and stuff. So what will be posted here are really pages of my life: events, things and memories I enjoyed.

That's all folks . :D